You ask what gives? Here's what gives,




I Love You and can't keep doing this to myself. You want a Friend and I can't be who I really am around you, I always have to conform to this friend mold you are tring to fit me into, im always scared im going to cross some line and mess up the friendship we do have. I can't and won't keep going on this emotional roller coaster.


When we spend time together my love for you grows and with it hope, hope that you have finally figured it out. Im not capable of sitting in the stands watching you play the field. Seeing you in the arms of someone else makes me sick, I just can't do it.

Every time I figure it out that you really just don't want me as more than a friend my world colapses, I get depressed and start tring to figure out why im not good enough and it's just not fair to me to feel this way. I am good enough, more than good enough, im unique and nobody will ever be able to be who I am.

I just can't be around you if all you want from me is a buddy or a babysitter for when you wanna get drunk and hang on guys at the bar. I deserve more, and I cant handle it.

Why I can't get over jenny? Hmmmmm Let's see it's probably because she's beautiful, smart, funny, talented, and because she has had a few problems she dosn't judge people the way others do sometimes. I love her even for her faults but loving someone dosn't make them love you.


If I dont stop this here and now im never going to find someone who I can share my life with, and even if I do im afraid im always going to measure them by jenny, I have no clue how to ever get over you, but hanging out with you wishing for something that will never happen isn't healthy.







Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with good. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.







Love never fails.